| When one lives overseas for a long time, he | | | | meetings, she felt that her president was blaming |
| experiences what he would not, otherwise. In first | | | | her. She, as a non-Japanese, thought that he |
| several weeks, he would be busy adjusting | | | | should not have accepted the visit from the |
| himself to the new environment. After a while, he | | | | beginning, if the president did not like the visitor |
| starts to think about his home country. If he is an | | | | come. |
| ex-patriot from Japan, he starts to be aware | | | | For this lady, if the president were "busy", he |
| about Japan, maybe for the first time in his life. | | | | should not have scheduled the meeting. If he felt |
| He could suffer from home sick around this time. | | | | the meeting was too long, he should have told the |
| As time goes by, in my experience, a Japanese | | | | visitor and end the meeting. If he believed that |
| like me started to realize that how he was | | | | the visitor's deal was not of the company's |
| ignorant about his own country. He would surprise | | | | interest, he should have told so directly to the |
| to learn how well his American Friends know | | | | visitor during the meeting. The president did not |
| about Japan. He might have regretted that he | | | | do any of the above. He finished meetings, smiled |
| should have studied about Japan more seriously | | | | to the visitor and sent him to the elevator. Then, |
| than he did. | | | | he started to complain about the visitor and the |
| He will also learn that he was wrong on his | | | | meeting. She could not believe that at all. Any of |
| presumption how the people in the world view | | | | these did not make sense for her. |
| Japan. A Japanese tends to believe that people in | | | | According to this lady, her president did not have |
| the world are knowledgeable about Japan. They | | | | any single case that he did not speak badly about |
| respect Japan and Japanese, as the country with | | | | the visitor after he or she had gone, his case |
| courtesy, politeness, neatness, long-term visionary. | | | | might be unusually extreme. Japanese have this |
| It might have been true once upon a time. After | | | | tendency, still. A Japanese growing up might have |
| so many years in foreign countries, non-Japanese | | | | heard his mother, politely showed gratitude to the |
| are well aware of the truth and reality about | | | | visitor who brought a souvenir, after the visitor |
| Japanese and Japan, now. | | | | left, complained about the visitor and souvenir. I |
| This is an article based on an experience of an | | | | heard my mother said "She should have learned |
| Asian woman who once was working in Japan. | | | | that our family do not like anything sweet by |
| She could speak English, Japanese, and her own | | | | now." It is the miss-communication by "Hon-Ne |
| language. She was so talented that she could | | | | (True Feeling)" and Tate-Mae (Words in Public)". It |
| work in a Japanese IT related company as an | | | | is the crucial part of Japanese culture that |
| executive secretary. She worked primarily with | | | | showing "Hon-Ne" in public is not polite. This cultural |
| the president of this company. The president liked | | | | behavior has built for a long time in Japanese |
| her skilled in business. He invited her to attend his | | | | history. It is not good or bad. It is a fact. When |
| meeting with customers and visitors. | | | | they are discussing the critical point of a business, |
| What surprised her was that this president, | | | | Japanese business people agree to negotiate in |
| despite that he is polite and courteous to the | | | | "Hon-Ne", to avoid misunderstanding. They say: |
| visitor during the meeting, while the visitor is with | | | | "Hon-Ne Only talk and deal, okay?" Then they |
| them, says so terrible about the visitor after the | | | | ignore politeness or courteousness and go directly |
| visitor left. This president says nastily about the | | | | to the point. They have a hard time to deal with |
| visitor to her or his employees usually. She | | | | this cultural issue some times. |
| remembered he said about the visitor such as | | | | There are a lot of Japanese who deals with all |
| "This person visits us whenever we were busy." | | | | cards open on the table from the beginning. It |
| "His conversation goes on forever. It never ends. | | | | may be useful, however, that non-Japanese |
| It is too long. He should have gone three hours | | | | should be aware that Japanese may use "Hon-Ne" |
| ago." In this case, the visitor came two hours | | | | and "Tate-Mae" from their cultural background. In |
| before. He meant that the visitor should not have | | | | that way, one may be able to comprehend the |
| come at all. "He has never come with useful | | | | true meaning and feeling of what they say. They |
| deals." Since she was the one who arranged the | | | | might not have meant what they have said. |